Me? A blogger? Nah.

Everyone blogs these days, except for me.

Screenplays

I like to write screenplays and me and Bryan are going to write a screenplay because screenplays are fun. And, after we're making movies, we're going to take over the world.

Our work-in-progress, tentatively titled "Kings of Pleasantry and Peasantry", will certainly make waves. It's not only brilliant, but also brilliant. And funny. People are going to really love this one. Plus, it's based mainly on actual events, which, when mentioned on a trailer, always seems to excite the audience.

As for casting, we're considering Tommy Lee Jones for Bryan's character (appropriately named 'Bryan') and Chiwetel Ejiofor for mine (not so appropriately named 'Jeff'). Other minor characters draw influence from high school pals Sammy Sundhausen and Drewothy Welborn, which we expect to be played by Sarah Michelle Gellar and Tom Arnold, respectively.

P.S. Chiwetel Ejiofor was born exactly ten years, to the day, before me. That makes us twins, kinda, and maybe it explains why I enjoy his work so much and why he should play me. Or maybe that's just a coincidence and he's a great actor. In either case, I'm looking forward to his next movie, Redbelt.

Bad Endings in '07

For some reason, many of the greater films of the past year had disappointing---if not terrible--- endings. There Will Be Blood, No Country for Old Men, Before the Devil Knows You're Dead. Juno and Atonement could be added to this list, but I won't be mentioning them in any detail, since neither was an especially good film---and neither was pretentious enough to merit a multiple-word title.

During all three of these films, I enjoyed myself immensely. However, for each one, I left with either a feeling of disappointment (Blood), bored confusion (Old Men), or frustration (Before the Devil).

In There Will Be Blood, the entire movie is carried by Daniel Day-Lewis, and he shines. It's worth it. For me, the experience was just watching him interact with others. The segment with the brother in the second act frustrates the audience by getting off track. The plot meanders, losing its focus. But I was fine with that. Then, at the end, Eli Sunday reenters and Plainview spouts some nonsense and kills him. Then he ends with a stupid saying, something along the lines of "I'm done."

In No Country for Old Men, the film ends with Josh Brolin being killed unexpectedly. Which was fine. But then the movie continued for another half hour or so, with Tommy Lee Jones' rote performance as the tired old man. He rambles on about the ways of the world with Ellis, a previously unknown character, leaving the audience wondering "What the hell happened to this movie?" The only explanation for Jones' presence in the end is his rambling monologue at the beginning. The two, together, form some kind of book-end. However, it's unsatisfying and dull.

By far the worst case of the three is Before the Devil Knows You're Dead. I loved the movie for the first two acts. Hell, I loved the movie for the first 100-plus minutes. The last ten killed it. The movie opens with the robbery scene, and we're on the edge of our seats, till the final confrontation at the end. The father follows his sons around all day, witnessing the frenzied flight of Hank (whose fate is never shown). He then has a chance to confront Andy, in the hospital, about the mother's death. His confrontation runs as follows: Father enters. Son explains himself. "There wasn't supposed to be a gun. She wasn't supposed to be there. She wasn't supposed to die." Father nods. Son says, "I'm sorry." Father says, "It's okay." Father snuffs son with a pillow. Great final moments, eh? After all the build up to this final scene, this key moment where the father and son can battle it out. I'm expecting at least a decent argument. Some sort of tension. Great conflict at the end. But no, they prattle harmlessly and the father smothers him. Our final moment is the father shuffling down a white hallway into oblivion. What a great ending.